On this day.

When I sit back and allow myself to look over my history,  I am able to recognize that I have led and continue to lead a truly blessed life.

Here is my pathetic attempt at articulating my thoughts. I am thankful for:

• second chances. Ramon, I have absolutely no idea how our story will end but I know that I love you more now than I ever have and I am more certain about wanting to be with you than ever. I have always looked at you and seen a loving, beautiful human being who makes me smile and lightens my load. Plus you are sessy. You are a blessing.
• soul mates. Alia, I have no idea what my life would be without you but you have been one of the defining factors in it for the past 10 years. You make me better, stronger, smarter, and above all happier. I would be lost without you. You are a blessing.
• family. Mom, Stad, Bonni, Andrea, Liz and Becca, we are a crazy, intense, passionate family. We have all been through a lot. But at the end of the day I know I can count on each and everyone of you. I know that we will continue to work on improving our relationships and interactions. And I know that you will help me pick myself up when I fall as well as cheer me on while I rise. You are all blessings. 
• true love. Lillian, you are not my daughter. But you are my heart and soul. I dedicated a year of my life to you (and your beautiful, amazing mother) and it was the best decision I ever made. I am so thankful that our bond has remained despite our distance. I am so proud of you every single day. I am so excited to see you grow and learn. You are so beautiful, you take my breath away. I worry that I won't love my own children as much as I love you (I know it isn't true, but until I test the theory, the fear remains). You are blessing in my life. 
• stability and growth. Synapse, what a blessing to have found my first real job with you. Not only have I gained an amazing friend group of incredibly brilliant and entertaining people, but I have found coworkers nourish my development. I appreciate having managers who are invested in my growth, who give me honest and helpful feedback, and who are willing to help me build my career. It's not everyday you have a boss who says "tell me where you want to go and we will get you there." I always said I never wanted to work 9-5 and I never thought I would work for a product development company (especially one that two of my sisters have/currently work for), yet you have made work fun! I love my job. I feel proud of myself. And I feel fortunate to have found this so early in my life and my career. 
• loving support. I used to surround myself with lots of people so that I never had to be alone and never had to deal with myself. Moving to AZ changed all that. I got to use to being alone and became comfortable in my own skin. This helped me realize who my true friends are, who is worth the time investing in our relationship, and who truly loves me. And because of this, I have the best friend group. Coral, Sarah, Madalyn, Brianne (just to name a few, but by no means all encompassing), you are amazing friends. You all have hearts of gold. I am blessed to have you in my life, blessed to know you, and blessed to be changed by your presence. 
• memes. You crack my shit up. You brighten my day. You entertain the crap out of me, my coworkers, my friends, and my family. Great invention. 
• nourishment. You know what I am all referring to: bread, cheese, red wine. 

I am also thankful for: good books. phenomenal teachers (aka Mr. Verver and Dr. Ira Hyman). intelligent conversation. random acts of kindness. snuggling. hot apple cider. fireplaces. snowflakes. christmastime in Seattle. a good cup of coffee. my nieces smile. google maps. leather boots. fuzzy socks. PANTH. songs that make me smile. the first real rainy day of the season. my education. sunrises. sunsets. the first sunny day after a long stretch of rain. the view flying into Seattle. having two MacBook Airs. grandpa sweaters. red lipstick. cat eyes. the smell of dog paws. a good burger. open-minded people. pasta. finding a new, cheap wine that actually tastes good. friend dates. living in a state that legalized marriage equality. hand holding. first kisses. funny youtube videos. good deals. the ability to walk. tattoos. hair dye. comfy undies. lazy days. great tv shows. good deeds. Avenue Bread. being able to vote for my mom in an election. chonga bagels toasted with cream cheese. all the heinous mustaches I see during movember. finding a penny on the street. seattle weather. hiking. emoticons. political discourse. feminist theory. my life.