The Real Housewives.
I catch a lot of shit for being a Real Housewives fan. People don't understand how I can be a feminist and watch shows like that, and so they call me a hypocrite. I find this to be absolutely hilarious because it is the feminist in me that loves watching these shows. To me, this is a real life glimpse into the stereotypes women face and the extremes of their responses.
-Traditional females roles
More than anything, I am fascinated by women in incredibly "traditional" roles within their family unit and how after only one season (because they only have to watch themselves once to be mortified), they begin to cope with this and evolve as a person. How could you not watch yourself on tv- seeing your husband diminish your ideas and crush your creativity with the rationalizing that it is harming "the family unit." I find it fascinating to see women struggle with the concept of their own identity as well as their role within the family unit. And I am fascinated by how they approach their evolution and how it impacts their relationships. The relationships either flourish or flail, and the women either come into their own or seemingly disappear, but there is hardly an in-between. There is no right answer, just an interesting real-life experiment tackling social norms and their impact on relationships.
-The scrutiny of women's bodies and the impact it has on them
It is incredible to see women on one hand talk about loving their bodies and their bodies being made my god, and on the other hand watching them delve into plastic surgery. It is heart breaking to see women's self esteem erode either through the crumbling of relationships, the teasing of their social circles, and/or through the pressures of media, to the point where they think they have to cut themselves up and buy their looks in order to attain beauty. I look at some of these women and my heart break because I know there is no amount of surgery that will make them feel beautiful, despite the fact that they are.
One woman was even terrified because her husband had paid for her plastic surgery and she wanted to be "perfect." The perfect wife. However when she opened up about miscarrying multiple pregnancies, she was afraid that eventually her husband would leave her. She thought her looks would someday fade and thus far she couldn't give him a baby, so what was her worth in the relationship? How heartbreaking that she thought her only value was in being mannequin or mom?
-Women and aging
We all know that the media rips women apart on their looks all the time. In fact, our entire culture is set up to pick apart and ridicule women down to the very tiniest detail. Aging is unacceptable. There is always a newer model. WTF is that?!?! Embrace your own body women. Embrace the wrinkles and the gray hair because it means you lived!
Yet as I watch these shows I see these women struggling to not age in their looks. When another, younger girl comes in and reminds me of what they might have used to look like, the instantly have pettiness towards them. And how could they not, they are constantly compared against them. And that comparison is made in a way to diminish the older woman. We, as a culture, don't see aging as beautiful. We constantly classify and emphasize what is and isn't beautiful. Don't be too thin, too fat, too curvy, too straight, too dark, too light, too tall, too short, too chesty, too flat. We don't teach people to embrace themselves and love themselves and see their body, however it may be as beautiful.
So yes. I watch Real Housewives because I find it absolutely fascinating for all these reasons and many many more. I have a deep desire to understand how people think and why they are the way they are, and with reality television you see so many more of the factors that feed into a person's life. I will continue to watch this show in all of the different cities and I will love it. And everyone can just shut up about it.
-Traditional females roles
More than anything, I am fascinated by women in incredibly "traditional" roles within their family unit and how after only one season (because they only have to watch themselves once to be mortified), they begin to cope with this and evolve as a person. How could you not watch yourself on tv- seeing your husband diminish your ideas and crush your creativity with the rationalizing that it is harming "the family unit." I find it fascinating to see women struggle with the concept of their own identity as well as their role within the family unit. And I am fascinated by how they approach their evolution and how it impacts their relationships. The relationships either flourish or flail, and the women either come into their own or seemingly disappear, but there is hardly an in-between. There is no right answer, just an interesting real-life experiment tackling social norms and their impact on relationships.
-The scrutiny of women's bodies and the impact it has on them
It is incredible to see women on one hand talk about loving their bodies and their bodies being made my god, and on the other hand watching them delve into plastic surgery. It is heart breaking to see women's self esteem erode either through the crumbling of relationships, the teasing of their social circles, and/or through the pressures of media, to the point where they think they have to cut themselves up and buy their looks in order to attain beauty. I look at some of these women and my heart break because I know there is no amount of surgery that will make them feel beautiful, despite the fact that they are.
One woman was even terrified because her husband had paid for her plastic surgery and she wanted to be "perfect." The perfect wife. However when she opened up about miscarrying multiple pregnancies, she was afraid that eventually her husband would leave her. She thought her looks would someday fade and thus far she couldn't give him a baby, so what was her worth in the relationship? How heartbreaking that she thought her only value was in being mannequin or mom?
-Women and aging
We all know that the media rips women apart on their looks all the time. In fact, our entire culture is set up to pick apart and ridicule women down to the very tiniest detail. Aging is unacceptable. There is always a newer model. WTF is that?!?! Embrace your own body women. Embrace the wrinkles and the gray hair because it means you lived!
Yet as I watch these shows I see these women struggling to not age in their looks. When another, younger girl comes in and reminds me of what they might have used to look like, the instantly have pettiness towards them. And how could they not, they are constantly compared against them. And that comparison is made in a way to diminish the older woman. We, as a culture, don't see aging as beautiful. We constantly classify and emphasize what is and isn't beautiful. Don't be too thin, too fat, too curvy, too straight, too dark, too light, too tall, too short, too chesty, too flat. We don't teach people to embrace themselves and love themselves and see their body, however it may be as beautiful.
So yes. I watch Real Housewives because I find it absolutely fascinating for all these reasons and many many more. I have a deep desire to understand how people think and why they are the way they are, and with reality television you see so many more of the factors that feed into a person's life. I will continue to watch this show in all of the different cities and I will love it. And everyone can just shut up about it.
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