"Dr. C had the innate gift in everything that he said and did which allowed people who worked with him to develop from within... I realize anew that he never hurried us. We were never made to feel that we had to be somebody that we were not, yet we were always encouraged to choose to be the best of who we were at the moment."
-Life's Journeys According to Mr. Rogers
Throughout my life, I have been told by many people that I was a major catalyst to them changing their lives or growing as a person. I've always seen this as a positive attribute; I encourage others to grow and become more than what they thought they were. And in so many ways it is a positive attribute. The standards I set for myself and the people I love are often very high, but only because I can see the greatness in everyone.
My shortcoming however is that I do not do it in the way that Mr. Roger's mentor did; through understanding, encouraging, and acceptance. I often do it through harsh words and reality checks. Can they be necessary at times? Certainly, but is that how I want to be defined? How I want to be seen?
I want people to know that while I may see room for growth, in them as well as in myself, that I am here for them on the journey. I won't shove them or drag them, or insult them or attack them for not being what I wanted. I will not make them be anything more than they are but I will always encourage them to be the best version of themselves at that moment.
We all fall short at times. We all do things against our moral code, things we didn't think we were capable of. The reality is certain situations and certain people bring out sides of us we didn't know were there. And for me, I have to remember that this has happened to me before and that I was granted grace by the people who truly loved me. And so I need to grant grace to those I truly love as well... and for the people that I just can't bring myself to forgive or to accept, I need to separate myself so that I don't force my own feelings on them.
People grow over time, not over night.
Comments
Post a Comment