What's so bad about loving someone?

Why do people talk about relationships as if being in one makes you incapable of also loving yourself at the same time? Is it good to go from relationship to relationship to relationship without giving yourself a chance to breathe or think or grieve? No. You are just transferring emotion onto another person. And then when the breakup comes, which it will, it hurts twice as much because you are grieving for the death of not one but two relationships.

I have said honestly and openly that I am not overly enthusiastic to reenter the dating world and be single. Not because I am afraid of being alone. Trust me, I really do like myself and enjoy my private time. My life is very fulfilling. I love my job, even if it is just retail; I am doing fairly well in school, am enjoying my classes and am close to graduating; research with my professor is going well and he asked me to continue on; and I am proud to be the President of Western Votes. Is my life perfect? No. But I am proud of the things I am committed too and I am thankful for my amazing family and my true friends. I live a blessed a life.

...But (and there always is a but) I feel like there is only a certain type of happiness you can attain without being in a committed, loving, meaningful, and passionate relationship. Life is good, but I feel like there is something missing. Not because I have to have a man, but because I have so much love to give. It is literally bursting through my skin. And I know how fulfilling it can be and how much it can enrich your life to be in a relationship with someone you love and who loves you. It is a whole different kind and higher level of happiness.

So while I may not be out looking for a boyfriend, I am looking forward to the possibility of being in love again. For anyone who has felt that way before, how can you NOT want to feel that again?

I don't have to love someone else to prove that I love myself. But I have learned that part of loving myself is recognizing that my relationships (be it with family, friends, or a significant other) are the most important part of my life... and I am proud of that. My heart is filled with love, waiting to be shared. Part of loving myself is loving others.

So please, stop telling me to learn to love myself. I do. And I am working on forgiving myself and others, which is a lifelong process. And if it so happens that I meet someone amazing, who makes my heart race... I will not let you step in the way and say that I am not focusing on myself. I will love them with all that I have.

AND I will have the wisdom to still love myself and be myself and let the happiness take over.